When Mercy Collides with Saturday Plans February 5, 2010

It was a Saturday morning and I was excited about all the stuff Benny and I would get done around the house that day: him working outside while the kids and I did our normal Saturday chores inside.

Then I learned that two of the kids had plans they were certain I knew about, but I was sure I was hearing about it for the first time.  Next came the phone call that resulted in Benny leaving to help one of our married kids with car trouble.  You know, one of those “this won’t take long” errands that stretches into hours.

My productive day was over before 10 AM.

After everyone but my youngest daughter left I pouted.  Whisked around my bedroom cleaning with that “mad” energy that descends when anger gives me fresh energy.  Rehearsed how often I give up my plans to serve my family and how faithful I am to put my plans on our family calendar so everyone will know what’s coming up.

So when Dave talked last weekend about mercy in marriage (and all other relationships) I was freshly convicted.  “Mercy,” he said, “has to do with how God related to us in our sin – we deserved anger and judgment, he gave kindness, patience and forgiveness.”  He talked about how comprehending this truth makes extending mercy take on new meaning.  We respond to others sins against us the way God responded to our sins against Him.  NOTE that links to the messages are now available on the sidebar to your right.

So often my pouting and anger and self-pity is a sinful response even to perceived sin.  Did my kids sin against me that Saturday morning?  Perhaps not.  Maybe they did tell me their plans and I forgot.  Or perhaps they didn’t tell me but should have.  (Can I say I have never done this same thing?)  And Benny certainly didn’t sin against me by the providential interruption to serve one of our children.

My husband and kids sin against me regularly.  Just like I sin against them.  Dave reminded me of the amazing privilege I have as an image bearer of God to extend the mercy to others that He extended to me.  “But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love for which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ” (Eph 2:4-5).  It’s true that “how we relate to others in their sin reveals our true grasp on the gospel.”

I need to grasp the gospel better.  One of the ways I’ll know that’s happening is my commitment to treating my husband, children, friends and even enemies graciously when they sin against me.

Oh…that reminds me.  I was really affected by the end of that message when Dave exhorted us to be more aware of how long it takes for people to change.  How does mercy come into play when it seems like progress takes soooo long?  It’s one thing to be patient and forgiving for awhile…but what about when those around me take what seems like forever to make progress?  How long do I have to be patient and understanding?  What does mercy look like then?

I’m smiling with you.  You “hear” the foot-tapping going on in my heart.  Clearly I needed this message…and need to listen again and again.  More on this in a later post.

Posted by Sheree