“I Love to Read” May 31, 2007

Homeschooling is a term I had never heard of prior to becoming a Christian and joining a church where many families educate at home.  I had attended formal institutions for all of my schooling, beginning in preschool.  My degree from college was in sociology with a concentration in geriatrics.  I had planned on working with the elderly as a career; the Lord had other plans =).

Todd Twining came into my life before I completed my degree and we married and had a child 14 months later.  (I waddled across the college stage at 8 months pregnant to receive my BS degree in gerontology at age 28 that I would not be using…God indeed has a sense of humor!) The topic of homeschooling was discussed while Michael was still in diapers, and we decided to begin schooling him at home at age four for preschool.  I was going to be a teacher =) !

During the last 8 years God has strengthened my convictions regarding homeschooling and I am truly grateful to be teaching my children.  One of the things I have endeavored to impart to my children is a love for learning.  My oldest has had some learning challenges, so having him at home has enabled me to spend the additional time necessary for him to progress through his studies.  "Love" is not an adjective I’ve ever heard him use related to schooling because it has been so challenging at times.  But, God is faithful!

This year, after he completed one of his first classic novels and wrote a short paper about the book.  He wrote the following words in the margin of his paper in his usual artsy style in bold print, "I love to read."  My heart was overflowing with joy as I saw these words.  God had done a work in my son’s heart.  God has used this milestone to encourage me not to grow weary in schooling him.

Sometimes I’ll find him reading to his brother, and actually enjoying it =).  Last week I came out of my room to find him seated at the kitchen table with his father with a cup of coffee and a newspaper in his hand.  "He’s enjoying reading," I’ll think to myself as I enjoy the scene.  This gives me faith for the other milestones we believe God would have him reach, and gratefulness for the ones that already have been reached.

Posted by Michelle

Indelible marks May 30, 2007

What is a milestone?  Webster’s 1828 dictionary defines it as MI’LESTONE, n. A stone set to mark the distance or space of a mile.  When I read that, I thought it was such an appropriate way to think about those significant events in my children’s lives.  They are not measured in miles, but they are like stones set in my mind and heart to indelibly mark points along the way of the wonderful journey we are on together.  I am reminded of how in the Old Testament days they set memorial stones to remember significant events.  The ways we celebrate these milestones, however big or small, are the stones which help me to remember the faithfulness and kindness of God to me and my family.

During the first year of my children’s lives, the milestones came so quickly.  It was a never-ending series of "firsts."  Each year they seemed to get farther apart, but they still come in both big and sometimes small and surprising ways.  So often, I find myself amazed at God’s kindness to me to allow me to experience these times with my children.

Maybe my past struggles with infertility, miscarriage and the death of my daughter cause me to ponder these things a little more than the average person….  Once again at Mother’s Day this year I was overwhelmed by the Lord’s goodness to me.  I am a mother, I have three children here that He has entrusted to me.  It was ten years of trying before I had a child with me on Mother’s Day.  Maybe that is why each small thing seems so priceless.

Sometimes, each day He gives me with them is a milestone.  Why has He allowed me this privilege?  Only because of His grace and mercy.  The gratitude I feel in my heart is difficult to explain.  What could be better than seeing Emma try to dance during worship, listening to Hope learn to read or praying with Matthew to become a Christian?   He has given me these children and He continues to allow me to celebrate these milestones in their lives.  They will continue to be big and small, joyous and sometimes challenging…..But as long as the Lord wills, I will continue to see His faithfulness and rejoice with a heart filled with gratitude at the continuing milestones in their lives.

Posted by Elyse

Jesse’s Graduation May 27, 2007

For the next two weeks we’ll be sharing stories about milestones in our children’s lives.  The purpose isn’t to draw attention to ourselves or our children, but to God’s grace in their lives.  Whether it’s something as simple as potty training or as significant as this first testimony, we can celebrate God’s faithfulness in their accomplishments — big and small.  May this series remind you of both the joy of motherhood and the thrill of entering into the happy milestones in our children’s lives.

It was the spring of 1985 and Benny and I had been asked to speak at a parenting seminar.  With four children ranging from 6 weeks to just 7, we were already feeling pretty unqualified to be teaching others about parenting!  The night we were leaving to do the first session, God saw to it that any vestiges of self-confidence were shattered.

Our almost 2-year-old son, Jesse, decided he didn’t want us to leave that night and he threw the first of numerous violent temper tantrums.  As we were walking out the door giving him hugs and kisses he suddenly started screaming, then fell onto the floor kicking and writhing.  After trying unsuccessfully to comfort and calm him down, my mom told us to just go ahead and leave so we wouldn’t be late. 

When we got into the car we wondered if we should not show up for the parenting seminar.

For several years following this incident Jesse threw numerous other tantrums — at home, in the floor of Toys R Us, at the Sunday meeting, and yes, in the lobby of Metro Life Church after we had just completed a parenting seminar when he was three. At that time we were apart of a church in Virginia with no thought of ever moving to Orlando.  I remember walking into the lobby after the Sunday meeting that morning to a crowd gathered around an angry, screaming child and humorously suggesting, "Ummm…someone might want to go and find this child’s parents!"

Today I am in Gaithersburg, Maryland awaiting tonite’s graduation of the Sovereign Grace Ministries Pastor’s College Class of 2007.  Eighteen men have spent the past 10 months in intensive study and training to serve as pastors in churches throughout the states and in Wales.  Guess who one of those graduates will be? 

Benny and I remember nights when we cried over him.  We prayed over him.  We wondered what would happen to the stubborn, willful, angry toddler who caused us to feel so helpless and inadequate.  One day as I was driving alone in our big 15-passenger van weighed down with concern for him, the Lord spoke reassuringly to me that the passion with which he sinned and threw tantrums would be harnassed by God into passion for worshiping His Savior.  I will never forget that day…or those comforting words.

So tonite I will sit by his dad and marvel at God’s mercy and grace.  Jesse will be commissioned to go and serve the local church with the training and instruction he has received this past year.  His mom will be thinking about that day 21 years ago when I pulled onto the side of the road unable to continue driving because I was overcome with emotion.  The day when God put faith in my heart that it wasn’t about my parenting, but about His power and grace.  I was weak.  I was afraid.  I was training and disciplining him with no apparent results.  But in my weakness God broke through to bring hope and peace and faith.

And where will he serve?  His office will be right next to his dad’s at the Metro Life Church building.  That temper-throwing toddler will now be a pastor-in-training for the very church where there are people who remember his angry tantrum over two decades ago. (Ask Don McGee…)

But tonite isn’t just for our family.  It’s for you, too. Do you have a child whose spiritual condition or sinful behavior is weighing you down?  Do you carry concerns about a toddler who seems unresponsive?  Are you weary from training and disciplining your child with no apparent fruit?  Then be comforted by Jesse’s story.  It’s a story of God’s power to change a child’s heart from a willful and stubborn passion to sin to a tender and genuine passion for Him. 

So today I’m thinking of you.  I have faith for your stubborn little toddlers because I’ve witnessed with my own eyes the amazing power of the gospel in the life of my Jesse.  In fact, I have a special place in my heart for toddlers who throw tantrums and keep their moms on their knees crying out to God for help. (Yes, Jaime, I’m thinking of you.) 

Tonite is a night to bask in the redemptive mercy of God for a family who is very undeserving.   I can’t wait to see the milestones that will come in your children’s lives someday as God’s power is made known in their lives…and yours.

Posted by a very amazed Sheree

Favorite Far Away Vacation May 25, 2007

Well, this was a far away vacation for us for our season of life.   We traveled to the North Carolina mountains one year to spend a week relaxing.  Oh, it was beautiful.  A simple 2 bedroom cabin with no cable, no Internet, and no cell phone.  We played cards and read and fished and played ping pong. ( I believe I was the champion that year!!!)  I have wonderful memories of sitting in a rocking chair on the porch with my husband just talking while our one child (at the time) played in the yard.  It was alot of work to get there, pack all of our stuff, and plan the meals but it was worth it!  I think we accomplished our goal for that vacation — to walk away refreshed, relaxed, making memories and sharing special time as a family. 

I hope this week has inspired you to think creatively and purposefully about your family vacation time.  Whether a long weekend at the beach or a week long trip somewhere far away what a blessing these times can be!!!

Posted by Taraleigh

Making Vacations Special for Your Husband and Children May 24, 2007

I don’t know about you, but our family vacations with small children looked nothing like the magazine covers.  There was no peace and quiet.  No refreshing drinks sitting closeby our beach chairs.  No leisurely opportunities to read a book between naps.  No hammocks rocking in the breeze as the sun set.  Vacations were and are the opportunity for moms to do what we do every other week of the year:  lay down our lives for our families by serving them.

One year the Lord showed me I had become resentful about vacations.  While Benny slept in after a late night of all the adults playing "Uno" or talking together, I was up in the night nursing the newborn and then up with the toddlers who never got the hint that vacations are for sleeping in!  If anything my workload increased with all the planning and packing beforehand, extra bathing and laundry of sand-filled heads and clothes, chasing toddlers down on the beach, running back and forth to the beach house for potty training or naps.  Whew.  I get tired just thinking about it.

Benny was always helpful.  He looked for opportunties to help and serve — just as he did at home.  It wasn’t anything he was doing or not doing…it was sin in my own heart that was causing me to resent the reality that vacations meant me focusing on making them fun and memorable for my family rather than looking to them as a break for myself.  I finally realized that vacations weren’t intended by God primarily for me to relax, but to "esteem others as more important than myself"…just like every other week of the year.

So here are some post-resentment ideas I came up with:

• Reminding my husband to bring along a fat theology or philosophy book to communicate my release of him to anticipate some relaxing time. (For your husband it may be a fishing rod, tennis racket, running shoes or a novel.)
• Planning fun things for the kids in case it rains or for a family night — craft supplies, coloring books, board games, a small box of legos, or etc.
• Purchasing some inexpensive things for the car ride — our kids loved those silly little books (Madlibs) where you put nouns, verbs and adjectives in random blanks and then read the story after you’re done.  Depending on how far you’re driving, you can bring out something new every 15 minutes, 30 minutes, hour or whatever spacing works.
• Planning a special date night with your husband.  We always had friends along for our vacations in a large beach house generously provided for us by some close friends, so singles were always along and willing to help with babysitting.  If babysitting isn’t available, a romantic evening after the kids go to bed is a great idea! Benny and I have some treasured (and hilarious!) memories of date nights at the beach.
• Our children’s favorite vacation memory?  "Day out with Dad."  Each day Benny would take one of the kids out for lunch, putt putt, ice cream, bumper boats or go karts.  Weeks before our vacations, they would start anticipating their time with Dad.  Of course, once we had 7 children he had to double up on the kids.  (Ask Joey about a hilarious day out with Dad when 2-year-old Julia had her first brain freeze at Dairy Queen.)

This year we will vacation with 6 grandchildren under age 6.  For a couple of years we’ve actually been able to sleep in or sit in beach chairs napping and reading.  But those days are over.  We’ll be helping chase down toddlers on the beach again.

I can’t wait.

Posted by Sheree

Seashells By The Seashore May 23, 2007

One of my favorite vacation memories was a year when we didn’t have a budget for a vacation; Money was just too tight.  However, my parents generously gave us a timeshare week, and we chose to take our kids to the west coast of Florida – Clearwater Beach to be exact.  This worked great because the condo had a kitchen, thus eating out wasn’t necessary.

As a way to make another trip to the beach memorable (for those of you who don’t live in Florida you may not understand why it wouldn’t be) we borrowed a library book about Florida Seashells.  It was full of colored pictures of every kind of shell imaginable!  We determined to collect as many different varieties of shells as we could and then identify them in the book. 

We learned that there are carnivore seashells!  Having been born and raised in Florida, I never knew that the shells you find with little holes in them are from the carnivore shells boring into the live shells for dinner!  I always figured it was just an old, holey shell!  We found a huge conk shell with the slimey creature still alive inside, and decided we wanted to keep the shell.  We boiled the conk out of the shell – something I would NOT recommend!  Talk about disgusting smells – it was so bad we had to set the pot out on the balcony, but what a memory we made! We found shells galore of all shapes and sizes. We were in awe as we realized how beautiful God’s creation is even in the secret places of the deepest sea.  He takes great care in glorifying Himself in the world He has created.  That was the best vacation inspiration – and it didn’t cost us anything!

posted by Debi

Mini Vacation Ideas May 22, 2007

We went through a few years in our marriage when it just wasn’t feasible for us to take a "regular" vacation. (i.e. being away for a solid week or two ).  This was due to a variety of reasons: not enough vacation days, busy schedule, finances, etc.  However, we realized that having time away as a family is very important.  So something that we started doing was long weekends away a couple times a year.  This gave us family time, but was workable for our lives.  We have made so many memories on these trips.  We have since implemented a beach week with our families during the summer, but we will occasionally still take a weekend away.

Some of our weekend trips have included the following destinations:

Disney hotels (the inexpensive ones!)

The Beach (we have stayed at different places, wherever we could get the best deals)

Liki Tiki Resort – www.islandoneresorts.com This is one of our favorites.  It is primarily a time share resort, but you can rent the unused rooms.  If you go off-season, you can get really good deals.  This place has a full kitchen, so you don’t have to eat out if you don’t want to.  A huge perk to this one is that they have a WATER PARK on site that is no additional charge!  My kids LOVE it.  I think yours would, too!

We often take a special surprise for our kids – i.e. new goggles, if we are going swimming, etc.  That is always fun!

So whether you take a 2-week vacation, or a few weekend trips, be sure to enjoy your family and don’t allow the stress of getting ready for vacation get in the way!  We are so blessed to be able to have special times like this with our families – make the most of it!

Posted by Stephanie

Family Time May 21, 2007

This week our focus is on planning and enjoying memorable family vacations.  Our desire is to inspire you with why family vacations are important and then to supply you with some practical and fun ideas that will help you make even the simplest, and low budget vacations memorable.  Today we hear from Michelle Twining, who not only exemplifies a genuine love and devotion to her family, but is today celebrating her wedding anniversary! So from all of us, Michelle, Happy Anniversary!  Thank you for the way you have committed your life to Todd and your two boys.  We have learned much by your example.

Vacations are very dear to our family.  It’s the one week each year that we completely devote to one another; Calenders are left on the desk, cell phones are silenced – except for emergencies, and mornings are spent sleeping in until we’re ready to enjoy the day =). It’s a very purposeful time to build our relationships with one another, but in a very relaxed way.

We’ve tried to help our children cultivate an excitement about spending time with one another.  In our culture today, relationships outside of the family can sometimes become more important, so we’re trying to give them a Biblical perspective concerning the importance of the family.  Taking family vacations gives us an opportunity to practice what we’re teaching them in a fun manner.

We’ve defined "vacation" as a week spent together enjoying one another.  We don’t always go away for our vacations.  This year we took a week off, but stayed at home and took day trips to local Florida attractions.  The highlight this year was our trip to the Alligator Farm in St. Augustine.  What boy doesn’t enjoy reptiles…especially having an opportunity to actually touch them?!

This year I purchased 3 new board games for our family vacation.  We’ve found that playing games together is a great way of being inclusive.  Even our youngest son can join in the fun, with a little help from Mom or Dad =).  Game playing is fun, but also sanctifying.  It’s yet another means of helping us grow in our relationship with one another.  Our new favorite is called "Zooreeka".  You’ve got to try it!

I have to admit that I most enjoy spending the evenings with my husband after the kids are in bed, exhausted from a day of fun.  It’s the one week of the year when we can have 6 consecutive date nights…now that’s what I call a vacation!!

Please…Pick One May 18, 2007

I (Sheree) had other plans for today but then I received this post from Taraleigh.  She is on our blog team and is a regular contributor.  But she’s also a learner.  She’s been reading the blog not as a team member, but as a mom who sees her need for help and Titus 2 discipleship in the training of her three young children.  She is, by the way, an excellent mother whose children are demonstrating the fruit of her (and Kyle’s) training and discipline.  Please read her post carefully.  These are wise and timely words…

Recently my husband and I were at a really nice restaurant where you could order a "trio" of desserts.  It was our anniversary so we decided to splurge and get three large desserts for just the two of us.  Oh my, I had a tummy ache, worse than when I had those donuts for dinner!

Over the last few weeks we have had so many great practical examples, testimonies, and how-to’s.  Haven’t we been blessed to have been so well taught and inspired?  Yet I have caught myself thinking, "Oh, I need to teach my son how to respect women; my daughter to respond by saying yes ma’am; and while I’m at it, I may as well train my 1- year-old to say yes ma’am since he’s just starting to talk; oh and my 6-year-old needs to start having devotions; and I love that idea about doing family game nights; and I need to be an example to my kids and start stopping for pregnant women I see on the road who need help!"  It’s overwhelming to think of all the things that I need to be teaching my children.  Parenting is a huge and sometimes daunting task!!!

Let me encourage you to pick one. Pray and talk to your husband about one thing to concentrate on right now. Not three or four or five.  Just one.  Don’t stuff yourself by trying to take on too much.  Here’s the even better news…something that I am so grateful for. In Isaiah the Lord promises something to us moms:

"He will tend his flock like a shepherd;
he will gather the lambs in his arms;
he will carry them in his bosom,
and gently lead those that are with young" (Isaiah 40:11).

Yes, the Lord is sovereign over our parenting.  He is leading us and our husbands through this awesome task…one thing at a time!

Posted by Taraleigh

One of Ten Children Shares About Her Mom’s Example May 17, 2007

Today you will hear from Julia, the second of ten children, share honestly and graciously about the example of her terrific mom, Virginia.  To be around this family is to experience life to the fullest! Virginia is a joy to know — and Julia is a testimony to the example of her mom, especially in the area of compassionate and merciful giving of her life away to others.

My mom, Virginia, wanted to be a missionary but instead
God’s will was for her to get married and raise ten kids (maybe more, who
knows! J). In my mind, she is a missionary. She has embraced this calling and has trained us a
lot by her example of a selfless, compassionate, servant. Mom has a heart for those who are in need,
which is often people she doesn’t even know. I remember when I was younger and
we were running errands on a hot day. We drove by a pregnant girl walking with
groceries and my mom picked her up and took her to her apartment. She followed
up with her and bought her diapers for her baby. When she makes sales from one
of her books, she gives all the proceeds to a pastor in Malawi and occasionally pulls together boxes
full of items to send over to Africa.  She
could easily use that money for herself but she finds so much joy in giving it
away.

Her joy and excitement made us want to participate! It made us want to send care packages, participate
in Walk For Life, and reach out to our neighbors. When people ask her how she
does it, she doesn’t answer or receive this question pridefully, she simply
says “By God’s grace.” She is not
perfect. She doesn’t have it all together. She loses her temper. But she is
always quick to realize when she does, and is always quick to repent and ask
for our forgiveness. When she is overwhelmed by the fighting or chaos in the
house and doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry, she chooses to laugh. We don’t
always have the most elaborate meals, and they aren’t always on time, but my mother
has shown us that what we have is plenty and that we are blessed beyond measure
when we are all together eating at our big table. Meal times are crazy at our
house, but my Mom has shown us that the noise we have is just a sign of the
Lord’s blessing on our lives.

Though my Mom has put much effort into instructing and
training me, there were years where I was grounded 320 days of the year for
talking back to her and my dad. There
were years when my heart was hardened towards having children, marriage, and
missions. For a couple years I wanted NO kids. J I have definitely not
arrived, and now have new issues I’m working through, but my heart has been
softened by God’s grace and by my mother’s example to me. She hasn’t just
instructed me, she has showed me how to live it out. I hope this encourages
moms who are not seeing much fruit of their labor. Stay with it! The Lord’s
mercies are new every morning!